These are my confessions

Wait a minute… July? Have I really not updated this blog since July?

Yes, it’s true, I’ve been a slacking blogger, to say the least. When last I posted, we were on our way to a fun family vacation in Florida. And if you didn’t know any better, you might think we somehow perished on that trip!

Well, we didn’t. But life has a way of sucking up time, and before I knew it, it was back to work in September. And as the days stretched on, the blog remained neglected. I hit a point where I realized I had a choice to make. Either confess to my lax attitude toward the blog and try again or just give up and delete the blog altogether.

It would have been simpler to delete the blog, that’s for sure. For one thing, I am teaching more hours than ever this semester (long story) and am up to my eyeballs every day in prep and marking. With two kids in activities and a busy schedule, I couldn’t blame myself for taking the easy way out.

But I haven’t even remotely reached any of my goals in this cleaner, leaner and greener journey and I do still have much I want to achieve. I need motivation, and by resuming this blog, perhaps I can dig deep and find some of that inner motivation. So back to blogging it is, after taking a six-month hiatus! Now, it’s not all dire and grim. I have been doing some work in at least one of these areas. Here’s my update:

Cleaner:

Okay, I’ve fallen really behind on the declutter/decrap the home project. After a good start, things really fell apart after the vacation in July. I started back at work, we went on TWO grown-up only vacations (yes, I’m spoiled) and before I knew it, it was January and all I’d managed to do is keep up with the regular cleaning.

This is actually my primary motivator for continuing the blog. I still have so much to do around here. My office is still a disorganized mess. The kids’ rooms are piled high with crap. And don’t get me started on the garage…

We did do a few projects. We painted and re-carpeted the basement, decluttering a bit along the way. We got new front doors and a new dining room table. But we still need some serious help, and I’ll be blogging about that as we go along. Thanks to my new inspiration – Pinterest – I’m going to be tackling 31 days of decluttering in March, along with a few other tasks. Oh, and we’re 99% certain we are going to re-do our kitchen this year. We need to get moving on that!

Leaner:

I abandoned the Paleo experiment right after our vacation in July. In all honesty, it was just not working for me. My family didn’t like half the recipes and it was just so darn hard to cook separate meals for them and for me.

This does not mean, however, that I abandoned my “leaner” quest. Quite the opposite, in fact! I’m happy to report that this has been my most successful area.

After a month or two of post-vacation slump, I’d had enough. I decided it was time to stop ignoring what had clearly been significant weight gain over the past few years, so I hopped on the scale. Or, rather, I BROKE the scale (metaphorically speaking). Ugh, my weight was higher than I realized and far higher than it should have been. I was veering dangerously into an area where my BMI (Body Mass Index) was actually overweight. For someone as into fitness as I am, that was unacceptable.

I decided to log back into My Fitness Pal and start tracking my food intake. I realized I had not been exercising as much as I used to (not running marathons anymore had taken its toll) and eating WAY more than I should. I diligently started tracking everything I ate and trying to stick within a certain calorie count. I restricted no foods, but did focus on eating fresh, whole, healthy foods with only occasional treats.

It worked. Okay, no, I didn’t magically drop 25 pounds. It did start coming off… very, very, very, very slowly. And since the beginning of November, I’m down 6.8 pounds in total. That might not seem like a lot, but I believe it is sustainable and reasonable. I feel 100% better than I did, so I plan to keep going even if I don’t lose another pound. If I don’t lose any more weight, I am going to have to accept the fact that this may be where my body wants to be. I refuse to starve myself or do anything crazy—when I do things like that, I put the weight right back on (and then some). So no more of that yo-yo for me.

Oh, and those black pants? They fit beautifully! Not even a little bit tight!

Greener:

I haven’t done a thing. Not one thing. But I will… it’s a journey, right?

So that’s the update for now. I am really going to try to update at least once a week with new things/ideas/recipes, etc. I’m doing it mostly to keep myself on track and to get my home and my life to where I want. I’ll have lots to update—like the fact I’ve re-fallen in love with Pinterest—and hopefully lots of progress to report in 2015!

What’s in a name, part 3

I’ve been working very hard these past few weeks on the first two words in the title of this blog: cleaner and leaner. But I’m still missing a very important third word, and that’s greener. So now, I need to clarify my goals with regards to getting “greener” and set myself on this path.

But first, an update. I haven’t been blogging as much as I’d like due to the almost overwhelming amount of work we’ve had to do to settle my late father-in-law’s estate. The good news is that it looks like we are finally on track for things to settle down. (I’ve spent more time cleaning out FIL’s condo than I have cleaning my own house, that’s for sure!)

And, of course, THIS also happened.

DONE! One goal down, three new ones to go.

As far as my own cleaning projects go, the kitchen is now also done. I also dusted everything in the basement, as my parents stay with us during the summer and I wanted it to be ready for them. Next week—the kids’ first week of summer holidays—I got the boys to agree to spend two days “renovating” their bedrooms. I called it renovating (my kids are HGTV junkies) to get them excited about it, but really, we’re just cleaning up their crap. I also got them new bedspreads (bye-bye babyish bedding with sharks on it) and I have promised them new desks for their rooms.

New desks – a reward for a cleaning job well done!

I’ve also been three weeks (and counting) on this “Paleo” eating plan. I’m using the quotation marks because I probably don’t have it exactly right, but I am not eating any grains, legumes or dairy. Instead, I’m eating lots and lots of fresh veggies, fruits, lean proteins and nuts. I’ve cut out the protein powder in my morning smoothie and replaced it with almond butter. I’ve made a ton of Paleo recipes courtesy of Elana’s Pantry (the Paleo Girl Scout Thin Mints are to DIE for). And I feel…. Fantastic. Seriously. I think I’ve lost weight (the black pants are getting looser in the waist… here’s hoping the thighs follow) and I don’t feel bloated at all. Sure, there are times when it’s hard, but I’ve also realized what an emotional eater I am. I crave sugar and grain-based carbs when I’m tired, stressed or frustrated. Learning to acknowledge this is important.

It’s going to be tough this summer, though, as my parents stay with us and of course they want to eat together. But their eating habits are very different from ours, so I anticipate it will be difficult to find that balance. Fingers crossed…

So, back to “greener.” The third portion of this is that I want to clean up my act, environmentally speaking. This one is going to take some time. One of the things I want to do is eat more organic food. I’ll admit, I don’t do that right now. I want to, but when I see the price of organic produce or grass-fed meats, I balk. I once went to an organic grocery store, and it was $15 for a pack of bacon! And almost $20 for chicken breasts! Not to mention $9 for three bags of milk.

It’s the same when it comes to cleaning products. Now, I always use vinegar and water as a glass cleaner (so there’s one thing) but I’ve tried all the baking soda/lemon juice/Dr. Bronner’s soap type homemade cleaners and I’m going to be honest here—they just don’t work the same way as Vim. (And I have a sneaking suspicion that all those “green” cleaners on the market are simply “greenwashing” in that they are not as environmentally-friendly as I think they are).

But I do know I want this to change. I want to spend some time researching and finding ways to go green that satisfy my inner Scrooge and my cleaning requirements. It’s not going to happen overnight. I’m not going to suddenly throw out all my food and go organic. But there are ways to eat organic on a budget. I used to be part of a CSA—community-shared agriculture—called Plan B Organic Farms. We stopped it a year or so ago, but methinks it’s time to restart. I’d also like to look at buying meat in bulk from local farms. Finally, I want to start experimenting with different cleaners until I find one that works.

Again, like the cleaner and leaner projects, this is all part of a process of changing and growing. I have a vision of what I want my life to look like; this blog is supposed to chronicle how I get there. It won’t end when my “summer of George” is over either. This is a long-term project; this summer is more about getting started than about getting finished.

That’s about it for this update. Tomorrow, I tackle the mass of paperwork that is my office. Time to get THAT back on track before the kids are done school. I’m feeling happier and more optimistic today than I have in a while, so here’s hoping I can keep that up!

Emotional rescue

I’ve been in a bit of a slump the past few days, which usually happens to me when I start “restricting” my diet. (And by “restricting,” I actually mean eating properly and not gobbling down whatever garbage I want!) The first few days are always the roughest, and this time is no exception.

That’s the thing, really. I truly want to get out of this destructive cycle I have of eating/drinking wine in an attempt to alleviate whatever stresses are in my life. Work, finishing a masters degree, and the death of a family member all pushed me over the edge this spring, and I got through each day surfing waves of coffee, cheese, carbohydrates and wine—and not necessarily in that order!

Of course, I know that this is neither healthy nor sustainable, so back on track I must go (as evidenced by the “leaner” portion of this blog). So why does it make me feel so blue?

As I mentioned in my last post, I’m really just sticking to three rules—eating real food, no food after 7 p.m. and writing everything down. But I’m not cutting out any food groups or types at this point. I don’t feel mentally ready for that.

Last night, I went for a run with my two running friends. We run several times a week, plus we’re all in the same exercise classes, so suffice it to say over the past few years we’ve become pretty close. We talked about just this topic, and it came down to this exact thing: emotional eating.

Now, this isn’t true for everyone—I do know lots of people who aren’t emotional eaters. But I also know a lot of people who ARE, and I’m definitely one of them. Unfortunately, my husband is also one of them, so together we are a lethal combination. When one of us is down, the other is quick to use food for consolation.

I’ve tried for years to get to the bottom of my emotional eating and it would seem I can’t. (Ya think?!). So for the next few weeks, I am really questioning everything I put in my mouth and asking myself the question: “Am I really hungry?” If I’m truly, tummy-grumbling hungry, then I should eat. (And again, I need to be aware of WHAT I’m putting into my body.) But otherwise, I need to really look at what is emotionally driving me to eat.

This isn’t something I’m going to overcome in a week or a month. It may take months, or a year, or it may be something I never truly get a handle on. That’s part of this whole “cleaning” process. But I’ve started. I want to get back to that place where I feel better about myself. I’ve been there (check out my marathon picture from 2010 – I’ve never felt better) and I can get there again.

Can I get back to this place again? (I’d like those arms back please!!)

How is everything else going during this “summer of George?” Well, the last few days have been busy with the minutiae of daily life and some job stuff that cropped up. (I don’t feel like getting into too many details, but suffice it to say it was more than a lack of food making me blue these past few days.)

Workouts are on track, as always! (Here’s a shot of me teaching a class a few weeks ago—yes, I’m in the middle of 100 squat leaps.) Later this week I want to post some thoughts about exercise and how it fits into this, but I’m sticking to my usual routine.

Squat leaps – oh joy!

I’m debating adding some more yoga to the routine. Went to my friend/trainer/all-round-fitness superstar Sue Abell’s Balance, Core and Flow class for the first time on Friday and was reminded of how GOOD yoga is for me. I’m looking at joining Climber’s Rock here in Burlington (with a 60 days for $60 climbing and yoga membership) to try and get more yoga in, but as of yet haven’t gotten up off my butt to do so. Maybe by Monday I’ll be ready and more into a routine with my new eating plan.

Lastly, on the “leaner” front, I have been diligently journaling my food intake using the My Fitness Pal app on my phone. Yes, it is something of a calorie counter, but it also takes into account your workouts, so I figure if I try and stick somewhere around the 1,500-2,000 calorie range per day, I prevent myself from overeating. (You know… I make sure the “treats” don’t go spiral out of control).

The cleaning project has suddenly slowed down after finishing the front hall last week. I said I was going to start on my bedroom this week… and, well, I haven’t. I think I will tackle my dresser drawers today, and hopefully get to the closet tomorrow. Friday will be pre-empted by the “regular” weekly cleaning (dusting, vacuuming, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the bathrooms, etc.), but if I can finish sorting through all my clothes and all of the kids’ clothes by the end of next week, I should get back on track.

I’m also in the mood to paint my dressers… the old pine Ikea dressers have seen better days, and are a bit “country” for my taste. My sister-in-law recently painted some of her furniture with Annie Sloan Chalk Paint, and she swears by it. I have a bunch of furniture I’d love to paint (or repaint) so I may have to try it out.

In need of some fresh paint?

And maybe some new knobs?

I still haven’t gotten around to reflecting on the “greener” portion of this blog, but that is also coming in the next few days. For now, it’s time to pull myself out of my little slump and stop feeling so sorry for myself. Life is good – it’s time to make it even better!